I felt surprisingly great today!—considering it was symphony and CPA’s. But they weren’t as bad as I had anticipated—they never are, but oh well, I worry anyway. I was pretty happy and fairly energetic all day, I even exercised (is it cooler to say ‘I worked out’? lol…it makes me sound like I have muscles…which isn’t true ha…). After getting home around eight from everything I was obligated to today, the sunshine in my brain started disappearing behind a big, gray cloud of sadness. I don’t really know where it came from.
I was talking to D about prom and the whole prospect of prom is pretty… unexciting. I guess it’s one of those things you hear about when you’re little and it looks so fairy-tale like… “oh yay I get to wear a pretty dress and have my hair fancy and have a perfect prince-charming date and it’s going to be so fun!”, but the reality of it is that yes, you might have a pretty dress and gorgeous hair, but prince-charming is busy croaking in his frog stage, hopping after some emotion-whoring, deep as a sheet of morning mist female that sets everything up for grabs on prom night. And the perfect time will turn into really crappy music and people humping each other like dogs. I will spend a lot of money on a dress and accessories and my hair and dinner and a ticket to the darn thing, just so I can go by myself, stand in a dark room, and look hott. For myself, of course. Because I will look hott. Two ‘t’s hott. ;-P I hate to sound so pessimistic (and narcissistic!) about something that is supposed to be a really special time. I mean, I still plan on going whether it’s by myself or… by myself. It’s one of those social/life/high school obligation things. But I still wouldn’t protest to a good time. 
Dizzy and depression free. 
